Sunday, September 30, 2012

Relief

Do you know what it's like to have the world swirl around you and your roommates flying around in the swirl and your stuck in the middle of it at home?
I do.

In a way it's frustrating.  Like I should be out doing fun stuff too.  Where is my fun special friend that has special interest in me, one from whom I actually don't mind special attention?

But mostly, it's refreshing.  That I'm actually not apart of the drama.  That I'm home, alone, being mellow, and that's ok.  I don't have my heart running up and down the wall like my roommates.

One is out every night country dancing with a boy while her missionary is preaching to the world; she is scared, and undecided on who to love and when to choose.  One has a boy she likes who has a girlfriend, so she writes him dramatic letters to tell him they can no longer be friends.  A third just got her heart broken by a man of her dreams, and cries, feeling loneliness throughout the day.

Now I hope you know that I'm not making any judgments on their actions.  If I were in any of their shoes I'm sure I would be doing the same things.  But I'm not--and for this I breathe a great sigh of relief.

1 comment:

heidi said...

It is six months later and then some since I've written this. Have I fallen behind because I didn't let the love in? Am I keeping myself from learning and loving, losing yet growing, all because I am too afraid to jump in?